We have the ability to choose who and what to fight for. We can choose which people, situations, and conversations to put energy in.
Here’s the kicker: because we can choose, we should choose less.
You don’t have to attend every argument or engagement, nor do you have to engage in every person’s existence.
Choose fewer battles.
I read this once and it stuck with me because I get invested easily. You could tell me about what your expectations are for the coming week and if I see you again I’ll ask about it, ready to give encouraging words and help. This leads me to be in situations I don’t too much care for and then I have the greatest internal struggle trying to let it go or reconcile the fact that I get invested without trying.
But we have to choose battles that are worth it. We have to choose battles that make sense. We have to choose battles that will help us be better people for ourselves and those we love.
The most important thing we need to learn is when to no longer invest in a battle.
A couple of weeks ago I wrote about getting another job. After obtaining clearance to start I had made up in my mind that I would work two jobs. Let me just tell you now that my mind was made up but my body was ready for the fight.
After working an eight hour shift, getting nearly four hours of sleep, and going through an entire 13 hour day (twice in one week by the way), my mind had to let go of that dream.
I enjoy staying busy. But I don’t enjoy not getting rest or time to myself.
Today I put in my notice for a job I love, but does not allow me to do what I love. Today I decided that I had to choose fewer battles. I was unprepared for days a time, not getting enough rest, and even forgetting to eat. These are all essential things.
With everything going on within the last week, somehow I still found time to myself most mornings. I found that having that time allowed me to function better, even if for only ten or twenty minutes.
So in addition to choosing fewer battles, take that extra time and meditate or just do something that brings you joy.
Choosing fewer battles doesn’t mean you’re giving in. Doing so means you’re setting yourself up for better. It means you’re saving that energy for things and people that matter. It means you’ll never regret the time and energy you put forth by thinking it was wasted.